Raptor Bracketology/Week 7 Lines

Great scott! Tonight’s blog will be the definition of optimism. Tornados are swirling our way and threatening to ruin the final week of the inaugural Raptor Winter League, but I will go forth to complete perhaps the year’s longest gambling lines post. Not only will we be previewing the pivotal Week 7 matchups, but we will also be taking a quick glimpse into next week’s highly anticipated tournament action. The league office reports that we will be playing a standard eight team tournament after the eight and nine seeds have played a play in game. In addition, All Up In the Bunt won the scheduling lottery and has already wrapped up their ten game season in Week 6, so they will spend Week 7 relaxing and finding out where their 4-5-1 record leaves them seeded at the end of the day. Let’s start at the bottom of the standings and work our way up based on seeding if the season ended today…or it was washed away in an apocalyptic deluge. Build your arks and let’s get started.

Whiskey Kick owns the head to head victory over the currently eighth seeded Foul Balls, but Whiskey falls into the ninth slot presently as a result of an earlier forfeit to Foul Balls. These two teams look headed for a play-in game rubber match in the tournament as Foul Balls face the Pounders and JFK while Whiskey Kick has a Pounders and Foot Snipers doubleheader.

The Chubby Gangsters have ridden a three game losing streak into the #7 spot and will face Frosty Ballin’ for the first time all season and then will see Kick Ass at 3:00 p.m. who previously defeated the Chubs 11-2. By virtue of a head to head loss to the Bunt, the Gangbangers would need to score two moderate upsets to jump the boys in black for the #6 seed. The bottom four seeds are pretty well set heading into Week 7, but #5 is where the real fun starts. For the remainder of the scenarios I have taken the liberty of making a few assumptions about how some games will turn out. If I have offended your team by doing so…then I apologize from the shallowest part of my cold, black heart. Also, ties are not allowed in Week 7 because they would make this way too complicated.

The Peninsula Pounders currently sit at #5, but have a triple header in the final week. The key game of the day for the Pounders will be a 3:00 p.m. contest against the Foot Snipers. Depending on other outcomes throughout the day, this game could catapult the Pounders into the #2 position, or could conceivably leave them back where they began the day at #5. A Pounders win could drop the current #4, Frosty Ballin’, down to the #5 position orrrrrrrrrrrrrr they could end up in a three way tie with Kick Ass and the Foot Snipers for third with the Pounders now holding second place behind JFK. Frosty Ballin’ owns the tiebreaker over Kick Ass thanks to a season sweep, but would find themselves in fourth behind the Snipers because of a head to head loss. Speaking of Kick Ass, they will have the most impact on how this whole mess shakes out with two games against JFK and the Snipers. They could be like Michael Corleone knocking off Sollozzo and Captain McCluskey in the restaurant and send the five families into chaos, or they could end up charging headlong into the toll booth like Sonny. Like the Frosty Balls, they could find themselves in the three, four or five spot depending on these two games against the league frontrunners. It gets significantly easier at the top of the standings. If bother JFK and the Snipers win out, they hold onto the #1 and #2 seeds, respectively. If the Foot Snipers were to trip over their shell casings and fall to both Kick Ass and the Pounders, which is not entirely out of the realm of possibility, then they could possibly find themselves as far back as a tie for fourth where they would hold the fourth seed thanks to their tiebreaking win over Frosty Ballin’. However, the Snipers only need to win one of these games to secure the #2 seed, which seems like a more likely outcome, and could only top the leaderboard heading into the clubhouse with a Kick Ass victory over JFK coupled with two wins of their own. As previously stated, its relatively straightforward for the Dead Kennedys, all they need to do is have some dead people vote in Ohio, beat Kick Ass, and they come in first, just like they did in ’60.

So there you have it kickball fans, this is what’s on the line in our action packed final week of the regular season. Where are the gambling lines for Week 7? I’m glad you asked Bundy and….and..anyone else out there?

Peninsula Pounders vs. Foul Balls

The Pounders will look to rest for a long day and cruise to a win over the Foul Balls. The play of Wade Brock will be like a soft pillow for the Pounders to rest their weary legs upon. Pounding Headache (-5.5)

Foot Snipers vs. Whiskey Kick

(See Above) Bullet the Blue Sky (-8.5)

Just for Kicks vs. Kick Ass

JFK needed a walk off single to fend off the Bunt in Week 6 while Kick Ass suffered their second loss of the season, once again at the hands of Frosty Ballin’. The Kennedys need this win to lock up the #1 seed while Kick Ass will be playing in the first game of a crucial doubleheader. Just For Kicks (-1.5)

Chubby Gangsters vs. Frosty Ballin’

The Frosties will ride their ace pitcher, Mark Flores, to their sixth win and then sit back and watch the madness unfold around them. Frosties (-2.5)

Peninsula Pounders vs. Whiskey Kick

Even the cats aren’t taking sides in this one, it’s a house divided battle. Don’t take us to the Pound! (-8.0)

Foot Snipers vs. Kick Ass

Much like in their first game, Kick Ass stands between the Snipers and a #2 seed next weekend. The Snipers winning strike was shot down in shocking Week 6 loss to All Up in the Bunt. Can the marksmen regain their early season mojo before tourney time? Click, click, boom (-0.5)

Chubby Gangsters vs. Kick Ass

The first time these two teams met, the Kick Ass offense fueled an 11-2 romp. The Chubbies remain dangerous, but don’t expect this one to end differently. Alive and kickin’ (-6.5)

Foot Snipers vs. Peninsula Pounders

This game will be huge in determining where the Pounders stand going into the tournament. This will be the final game of a triple header for both teams so we’re bracing for a battle of wills between these two talented squads. Pick ‘em.

JFK vs. Foul Balls

The Foul Balls really want to face Whiskey Kick in the play-in game, so they’re going to intentionally throw this game. They will do so by putting Wade Brock on the mound. JFK (-9.5)

This really happened on a Friday night....