Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Week 2 Gambling Lines: Veronica Mars Investigates the Peninsula


Veronica Mars fans and creator Rob Thomas have made (internet) headlines recently with a wildly successful Kickstarter campaign which has raised $5.7 million to finance a theatrical film based on the CW series.  Veronica, Keith, Weevil and the entire town of Neptune will be back in the spotlight and on the silver screen shortly.  With any luck, my donation will win me the role of town bookie in this forthcoming classic detective noir film.  To boost my campaign, I bring you the Week 2 WAKA Peninsula gambling lines that Veronica would be proud to fake bet on.

Best. Television series. Ever.


Pop Pop (-1.5) over Rumspringa
Who killed Lilly Kane?  The question of who murdered her best friend haunted Veronica throughout season one.  Who is this Pop Pop team who arrived new to WAKA VA Peninsula in the Spring 2013 season and knocked off preseason favorite Moose Knuckles in dramatic fashion?  Like Kristen Bell, star of Veronica Mars, they are young, hot and blond.  Now Pop Pop faces off against one of the league’s longest tenured team, Rumspringa, who are surely headed for Peninsula syndication after many successful seasons.  Another early season matchup which will have implications in determining the top seeds come tournament time.  You make the call.

The Misfits (-4.0) over New Kickheads
Veronica became a bit of a misfit at Neptune High School after her father, Keith, wrongfully accused the wealthy software entrepreneur Jake Kane of murdering his daughter.  Will the Misfits rise to the elite social status of the 09ers or fall back into a more fitting role with Weevil and his biker gang?  In Week 2, The Misfits will “Walk Among Us” and advance to 2-0 over the New Kickheads.  However, it is 90s week, so don’t count the Kickheads on the Block out.  It’s horror-core punk rock vs. boy band bubble pop…sounds like Kim Merritt’s new musical side project.

Dirty Mike and the Boyz (-2.0) over Chubby Gangsters
The PCHers were the bike gang which ran the Neptune High School criminal underground and were led by the original Chubby Gangster Eli “Weevil” Navarro.  I always had a problem with the fact that Weevil’s full helmet did not appear very gangster, and likewise the CG’s were not very Gangster-esque in their spring debut.  Meanwhile, newcomers Dirty Mike and the Boyz made a big splash in Week 1 with a 12-1 win over Chicken Tetrazzini.  It’s like when Wallace Fennel, Veronica’s best friend and source in the school records office, joined the Neptune High School basketball team and made an immediate splash.  Wallace’s afro looks kind of like Fozzie’s bed head. 

Moose Knuckles vs. 5 O’Clockers Pick ‘Em
Like the Veronica Mars series, the Moose Knuckles are critically-acclaimed, but lack popular appeal.  The 5 O’Clockers are a long-running series and are also deserving of their own film series.  The Clockers have made a dramatic attempt at winning the ratings battle by totally reworking their cast for this season and adding in several new cast members.  The new characters appeared to gel well in Week 1 as the Clockers scored a solid win over Rumspringa 2-0.  Don’t expect a lot of offensive fireworks in this one, but if you’re a fan of crisp, clean kickball action, you probably want to tune in at 7:30.  This showdown will be reminiscent of the Season One finale when Veronica faces down Lilly Kane’s killer (no spoilers here) on a rainy night at a cabin in the woods.  It’s a star-studded affair.

Free Ballin’ (-1.5) over Battlestar Ballsacktica
In Season 2 of Veronica Mars, Steve Guttenberg arrives on the scene as the owner of the local baseball franchise in Neptune.  Mark Flores resembles a late career Steve Guttenberg, ripped to the core.  Free Ballin’ eked out a Week 1 win over That Just Happened, but displayed an impressive defense in the effort.  The Battlestar draws its namesake from two classic sci-fi television series, which somehow fails to help them in this week’s gambling lines.  Mary Katherine Evans Hogg is probably a Cylon out to destroy BB.

Who’s Driving Home vs. Chicken Tetrazzini: PIck 'Em
After Veronica Mars, Rob Thomas went on to create the hilarious Adam Scott Showtime vehicle Party Down.  Who’s Driving Home has been fashioned in the same manner, from several out of work actors from Veronica Mars and other canceled kickball teams.  Unlike the first episode of Party Down, it’s impossible to tell if Brian Neal’s Who’s Driving Home will be a hit or a flop.  The Angry Birds look to bounce back from an embarrassing beating in Week 1.  Hard to tell with these two teams, so we leave it in the viewer’s (bettor’s) hands.

Kick Ass (-1.5) over That Just Happened
Kick Ass initiated their own Kickstarter campaign to raise money for Danger’s rehab over the winter.  The rehab stint didn’t work and the men and women of KA were up to their old tricks in a 5-2 Week 1 win over Battlestar.  That Just Happened is a new WAKA squad under the leadership of Geoff Morehart.  Katie Litle is on TJH and I can’t help but think she would have played the feisty Veronica Mars in superb fashion.  Kick Ass gets the nod from the oddsmakers after Week 1, but beware this new That Just Happened team once they have a few games under their belt. 

Free Ballin’ (-8.0) over Who’s Driving Home
In Season Two, Veronica investigated a tragic bus crash which claimed the lives of several of her Neptune High School classmates.  Not nearly as tragic, but, on paper, this game appears to be a bus crash of epic proportions.  Free Ballin’ is locked and loaded and looks to flex their muscles in this Week 2 matchup. 

Foul Balls vs. Peanut Butter Jelly Time: Pick ‘Em
I’m so damn excited for a Veronica Mars movie that I couldn’t make up a line for this game.  That or it will just be an evenly matched contest between two up and coming squads.  Will Veronica go afoul of the law as she is wont to do, or will she ever return to the life of a fun-loving high school senior who enjoys an afternoon peanut butter jelly sandwich with her friends?  Wade Brock is Logan Echolls.  What a tool.

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