CLUBWAKA MLS Spring 2020 - Preview

RETURN OF THE MEDI (OCRE)

And with March comes the emergence of the beautiful butterfly that is CLUBWAKA MLS.  To be honest, this season's version is more like Mothra in that it seems to have mutated and grown to Godzilla size.  I remember joking a few seasons ago about getting to 20 teams and splitting into two divisions with promotion/relegation.  Who knew we'd be more likely to have a World Cup infrastructure than an EPL infrastructure.  More to come on that in a bit... but let's get back to introducing you to this beautiful butterfly.

The following is a basic intro to the teams in the league in alphabetical order.  No analysis - just a start so you can orient yourself to what teams are in the league, who's kind enough to captain each team, and what color they are.  Following that, we'll cover some super exciting news regarding how the schedule is going to be built and when it will be announced so be sure to read all the way through.

MEET THE MLS!

1. Balls Deep

Captain: Dani Robinson

Color: Jet Black

Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 0

All Time Record: 0-0

Previous Award Winners: Dani Robinson - Golden Gal - Fall 2019

Titles: 0

Lots of former Hot and Messi players looking to jump directly to end this season where they ended last season - top of the table.

2. Barce-loners

Captain: Adam Carr
Color: True Royal
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 0
All Time Record: 0-0
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

A free agent squad that may take a few weeks to gel.  But I know a few of those that are signed up and this is going to be a fun and talented squad once they get to know each other.

3. DOTB

Captain: Carl Hanson
Color: Bright Aqua
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 2
All Time Record:  6-8-3
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

The Lionsbridge FC Die-Hards are back with their player-coach Chris Whalley looking to build on last year's middle of the table finish.

4. FKs and Lagers

Captain: Callum Sutherland
Color: Neon Orange
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 0
All Time Record: 0-0
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

A spin-off squad from PKs and IPAs, Callum looks to repeat PKs success from last year with some goals off free kicks and a whole lot of Oozlefinch lagers.

5. Hampton Hotspur

Captain: Jason Fisher
Color: Navy
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 0
All Time Record: 0-0
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

A former White Jogger, Jason Fisher took a season off to run a marathon and do some recruiting.  Now he's looking to take the Hampton Hotspur from expansion team to MLS Cup champs.

6. Hangover 86 FC

Captain: Mickey Amaro
Color: Custom Blue Jerseys (Aquatic Blue Alternate Kit)
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 4 (original team)
All Time Record: 14-13-3
Previous Award Winners: Mickey Amaro - Golden Gal - Spring 2018; Chris Garcia - Hands of God - Fall 2018
Titles: 0

Mickey brings the team back for a fifth season with some brand new kits and a hunger for their first MLS Cup.

7. Hot and Messi

Captain: Brittany Thomas
Color: Kelly Green
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 4 (original team)
All Time Record: 10-20
Previous Award Winners: David Chappell - Sign-Up Simon - Fall 2018
Titles: 0

After an amazing run last season, Hot and Messi has changed colors, personnel, and their captain - but look to keep the same results.

8. Hungry Hippos

Captain: Maegan Kranz
Color: Neon Orange
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 0
All Time Record: 0-0
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

A new squad to the league with an absolutely amazing sign up period - the whole team signed up in a few days.  Looking forward to seeing what they can do on the pitch.

9. Hurting Feelings Football Club (formerly All Stars FC)

Captain: Heriberto Lopez
Color: Charcoal
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 2
All Time Record: 9-4-3
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

After squeaking into the top bracket last year, All Stars won their play-in game and lost the second game to the number 1 seed (Hot & Messi) 1-0.  Always a factor in the top of the table, they're likely to make some squads shed some tears.

10. ITWCDBII: Electric Boogaloo

Captain: Caitlin Weirick
Color: Neon Pink
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 1
All Time Record: 3-3-2
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

Leadership of ITWCDB transitioned from Gabe Fricke to Caitlin Weirick in the offseason and that added as a splash of color as they decided to go from white to neon pink.  No one thought they'd finish in the MLS Cup Playoffs in their first season in the Fall, but they defied expectations.  Something Caitlin hopes they'll do this season.

11. Kick in a Box

Captain: Chris Kostryka
Color: Custom Black Lonely Island Jerseys (Alternate Kit: Navy)
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 4 (original team)
All Time Record: 8-18-4
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

After the split of KIAB and Motherlovers last season, KIAB needed an adjustment season.  They've refueled with some new blood and have been practicing weekly.  Watch out WAKA.

12. Look Ma, No Hands

Captain: Jamie Chard
Color: Neon Green
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 4 (original team)
All Time Record: 14-15-2
Previous Award Winners: Calli Sherrill - Golden Gal - Fall 2018; Joe Ingraham - Hands of God - Spring 2019
Titles: 1 MLS Cup Championship (Spring 2019)

**Added post-publication due to Lindsay Ingraham rightfully calling me out.**

Look Ma went from the penthouse to the outhouse in one season, but with a more favorable schedule in the Spring and a restructured roster based with increased likelihood of attendance, they're ready to get back into the top tier where they belong. 

13. Misfits

Captain: Adam Frantz
Color: Custom Black and Royal Jerseys (Alternate Kit: True Royal)
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 3
All Time Record: 11-10-3
Previous Award Winners: Adam Frantz - Sign Up Simon - Fall 2018; Buck Waldrop - Hands of God - Fall 2019
Titles: 1 Division 2 Cup Championship (Fall 2018)

So much recruiting, so little time.  Although this season puts Adam and his band of Misfits in a replacing scenario as a couple of key contributors aren't playing.  Either way, they're still a heavy favorite to at least make the final 4 if not bring home their first MLS Cup trophy.

14. Moat Monsters

Captain: Michael Dorsey
Color: Team Purple
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 4 (original team)
All Time Record: 23-6-3
Previous Award Winners: Sarah Watson - Golden Gal - Spring 2019
Titles: 2 MLS Cup Championships (Spring 2018 and Fall 2019)

The most consistent team in the league who added to their riches in the Fall with their second championship.  Watch how they move the ball week 1 - the gold standard in organization even when they don't have people show up.

15. Mother Lovers

Captain: Ryan O'Donnell
Color: Custom White Lonely Island Jerseys (Alternate Kit: Team Purple)
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 1
All Time Record: 6-3-1
Previous Award Winners: Ryan O'Donnell (Sign Up Simon - Fall 2019)
Titles: 1 Division 2 Cup Championship (Fall 2019)

They're back for some additional lovin'.  A top tier team that was beat out on tiebreakers -- they ran the table to secure the Division 2 Cup in the Fall, but they look to do more than that in the Spring.

16. Multiple Scoregasms (formerly Soccer? I Hardly Knew 'Er)

Captain: Zach Murrell
Color: Dark Green
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 1
All Time Record: 3-5
Previous Award Winners: Ryan Greene (Golden Boot - Fall 2019)
Titles: 0

Multiple Scoregasms has 15 guys on their team, so don't expect them to get tired.  They also added some additional firepower to an already high powered offense.  Expect them to take a huge jump up the table in the Spring.

17. Netkicks and Chill

Captain: Sam Huffman
Color: Neon Yellow
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 4 (original team)
All Time Record: 11-16-2
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

Netkicks had a huge drop off last season after finishing last Spring 6-1.  Part of that is due to schedule, but part of it was due to attendance.  If they can get their squad to show up, expect them to be in the fight to make the top bracket.

18. Oozlekicks

Captain: Jay Coble
Color: Neon Pink
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 4 (original team)
All Time Record: 18-9-4
Previous Award Winners: Jay Coble (Hands of God - Spring 2018); Tom Weniger (Golden Boot - Spring 2018); Tom Weniger (Golden Boot - Spring 2019)
Titles: 0

The Ooze had a phenomenal season in the Fall finishing close to the top and then beating Ronaldo in the first round of the playoffs.  Extremely good keeping, multiple top goal scorers and an organized defense.  Another major contender for the Cup this season.

19. PKs and IPAs

Captain: Erik Halvorsen
Color: Cardinal
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 2
All Time Record: 7-6-1
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 1 Division 2 Cup Championship (Spring 2019)

Springing off their Division 2 Cup Championship in their first season, PKs skied up the table to finish last season in 4th place.  With a few of their players leaving for FKs and Lagers this season, they'll be looking to replace those pieces and continue to progress.

20. Rebel Alliance

Captain: Katelynn Cioffi
Color: Dark Green
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 1
All Time Record: 4-5
Previous Award Winners: Scott Tinsley (Sign Up Simon - Spring 2018)
Titles: 0

The Rebels are back and have added some additional firepower in Gary Johnson and Scott Tinsley.  Expect them to compete with the top tier teams in the Spring.

21. Retired Athletes

Captain: Hector Ramos
Color: Aquatic Blue
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 2
All Time Record: 4-9-2
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

Listen - I'm going to be honest about my bias.  Retired Athletes are one of my favorite teams in the league.  Always a smile on these guys and competitive to boot.  They return most of their squad from the Fall and I expect them to improve on their 2-6 record.

22. Ronaldo McDonaldo

Captain: Brad Kirby
Color: Custom Red Jerseys (Alternate Kit: Jet Black)
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 4 (original team)
All Time Record: 24-5-1
Previous Award Winners: Michael Machie (Golden Boot - Fall 2018)
Titles: 1 MLS Cup Championship (Fall 2018)

After their worst finish in 4 seasons, Ronaldo looks to get back on top in the Spring.  Was it their age?  Was it their captain's lack of focus on team as he tries to grow the league?  Was it injuries?  Was it baby making?  Who knows, but let's hope it doesn't happen again.  They're trying to keep up with Moat.

23. The Buffalos

Captain: Brian Diamond
Color: Charcoal
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 0
All Time Record: 0-0
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

The smallest roster in the league at 7 guys, 6 ladies, the Buffalos look to come out and prove they're way more than just another name for Bison.  My guess is they spend the whole season out-talking Adam Frantz and they may just be the newcomers of the year.

24. Unatletico Monroe

Captain: Dustin Harris
Color: Athletic Maroon
Seasons in CLUBWAKA MLS - 3 (as various names like Ibra Kadibra and White Joggers)
All Time Record: 7-15-2
Previous Award Winners: None
Titles: 0

UAM was close to making a run to the finals of the MLS Division 2 Cup playoffs last season with a win over Soccer? I Hardly Know 'Er in the first round only to narrowly lose to DOTB in the semis.  My guess for the outcome of the 2019 season? Favorite for the MLS Division 2 Cup.

THE SCHEDULE

Oh snap.  You guys don't even know.  Towards the end of the Fall season, the MLS Historical Society, myself, and Brent Wentworth (CLUBWAKA Hampton Roads CEO/President/Hero/Legend) began discussing ideas for how we could structure the schedule in 2019.  Dave McLain of Oozlekicks wanted divisions like the NFL.  Ryan O'Donnell asked a statistician to come up with a complicated BCS algorithm weighing results based on strength of schedule.  There was also lots of talk of two divisions with promotion/relegation.  Ultimately, I'm WAAAAAAY more excited to announce this.

So here goes... I'm proud to announce we will be basing our Spring 2020 Schedule on the FRICKIN FIFA WORLD CUP (or the Champions League if you'd prefer)!!!

What does this entail exactly?  

1. Teams have been ranked by yours truly based on a number of factors -- (1) previous performance (2) roster analysis, (3) league longevity and (4) the German National Team Manager Joachim Loew sniff test. #respect

2. Teams will then be split into 4 tiers (6 teams in each).

3. The 24 teams will then be randomly assigned to 6 different bins with a tier 1 team, a tier 2 team, a tier 3 team, and a tier 4 team in each 'bin'.  

4. Each team in the bin will play the other teams in the bin.  Then that bin will play 1 other bin.  So 3 games in your bin and 4 games against another for a total of 7 total games.  For example.. Team A in Bin 1 plays Team B, C, and D in bin 1 and then plays teams A, B, C, and D in Bin 2.  Bin 3 would play bin 3 and 4 and so on.

5.  The top two teams in each bin will advance to the MLS Cup Championship Playoffs.  The bottom two teams in each bin will advance to the MLS Division Two Cup Playoffs.

In future seasons, as your performance changes, you can move up or down the tiers just like in the FIFA world rankings.  This is obviously not a scientific ranking system, so if you don't like where I think you'll fall, prove me wrong but don't come at me spittin' Haterade as I don't have time for that drama.

6.  So where do we go from here?  I will post the teams and how they fall into each tier on the Facebook Group Page on the morning of Thursday March 5th, 2020.  Brent, Ryan, or I will then pull the 'bins' at some point later in the day - not sure if it'll be during the day or in the evening yet, but either way we'll let you know in advance when it's going to be and then try to post it on Facebook Live so everyone can follow along or watch later.  Then the schedule will be posted this weekend.  Stay tuned and if you have any questions at all... hit me up.

Talk to you all on the 'morrow.

CLUBWAKA MLS Spring 19 - Week 7

WEEK 7 - Game Over, Man

So much talk last week on the blog about how the final week of the season would turn out.  6 Analysts gave us their predictions and we mapped out scenarios for each of them, but only one got them all correct.  Only one seemed to have ESP.  Seemed to be the Oracle.  Seemed to be that weird turtle thing from Neverending Story.  And yet.... so much hate.

So while Jay serves up some sick burns, you know behind the scenes he's calling me Mediocredamus with the way I be predictin' MLS scores.  

And with so much build-up, just when you think you can't get more amped on some CLUBWAKA Soccer Action, HERE COME THE PLAYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFFS.  *Air Horn Toot*

But first...

Shoutouts (and hugs)

- Shout out to all you moms and you moms moms who came out to the games on Sunday and spent the day with us.  I'll let All Stars FC take it from here... 

- Special shout out to Ryan Speed of PKs and IPAs and Scott Troutman of Misfits who helped us out of a bind and reffed 4 of the games on Sunday.  That's two weeks in a row for Ryan and while this is Scott's first time reffing CLUBWAKA MLS, he's offered to help when we've been in a bind before -- so many thanks, guys!  Sunday wouldn't have happened without you.

- Shout out to all of the analysts last week - Bailey Riley of Ronaldo McDonaldo, Calli Sherrill of Look Ma, No Hands, Buck Waldrop of Misfits, Brandon Adrian of All Bark No Bite, and Jay Coble of Oozlekicks.  Know it took time to make your picks and analysis and it was much appreciated.

- Shout out to Hot and Messi.  For the last few weeks, they've been hurting on numbers and they haven't closed up shop and forfeited.  They've come out and played down with a ton of heart.  Much much respect.

- Shout out to all of the folks that are scoring your first goals!  Over the past few weeks, we've had Claudia Galantino and Cristina Genoese-Zerbi get their first goals for Netkicks, Jennie Grayson get one for Hot and Messi, and Erin Weniger of Oozlekicks knocked her first in the ol' onion bag and there's nothing that warms my heart more. 

- Shout out to Jay Coble who won't get recognized later in the blog for his play, but dude was absolutely bananas against Hangover on Sunday.  So many amazing saves. 

- Shout out to those asking for more soccer.  I've had a lot of people ask whether we can extend the season, add doubleheaders, have a Summer season, have a Winter season.  While there's nothing that's more flattering to the league, I need time to recharge my batteries.  That's where CLUBWAKA's other sports come in. 

1.  Have you ever wanted to get drafted like you're in the NFL?  Have you ever wanted to play striker and keeper at the same time?  Well, a kickball draft league is for you!  Luckily, CLUBWAKA has two this summer - one in VB and one in Hampton. Seriously, I can't say this enough.  The draft party and the subsequent season are amazing and a fantastic way of meeting new people.

VIRGINIA BEACH
· When: Mondays beginning July 8th
· Location: Bayville Farms Park
· Postgames: Bucketheads Beach Grill 
· Draft Party: Sunday, June 30 (Details Coming Soon!)
· FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/CLUBWAKA.VirginiaBeach/
· Website: https://www.clubwaka.com/hampton-roads/kickball/monday/1927

HAMPTON
· When: Wednesdays beginning July 10
· Location: Briarfield Park
· Postgames: Announcement Coming Soon!
· Draft Party: Sunday, July 7 (Details Coming Soon)
· FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/WAKAVAPatriotKickball/
· Website: https://www.clubwaka.com/hampton-ro…/kickball/wednesday/5003

2.  You have two seasons of soccer and that's enough kicking?  Well, how about some beach volleyball right down the street at Paradise Ocean Club?  A season is too much commitment?  OK, we got a one day charity v-ball tourney for you then. 

3.  That too much sweatin' for you and you'd rather be inside with a nice Bud Light cuttin' it up with your friends?  Bowling or Bar Games may be the answer.

Soccer ain't the only sport out there.  

Spread your wings, chil'n.  There are new frontiers to conquer.  

Diversify yo bonds, son.

HOUSEKEEPING

1.  No housekeeping.  

WEEK 7 RESULTS AND STANDINGS

All Bark No Bite vs. Retired Athletes - 'RA introduces All Bark to the Early Bird Special.'

Retired Athletes went from no wins and sniffing the cellar to jumping up the table to finish tied for the 7th best record in the league.  Impressive.  A couple of goals by Kevin Wortham and another screamer by Liz Gildo led them to victory despite All Bark coming out firing. 

Final - Retired Athletes 5 - 2 All Bark No Bite

Biercelona vs. Defenders of the Bridge - 'Biercelona douses the Lions!'

Didn't get to see much of this one, but did hear Kathy White and Erica Rice played the entire game for DOTB while Scott Hines had another brace.  Biercelona turned on the offense the past two weeks with Edgardo Martinez continuing his hot scoring streak with another hat trick and another couple from Jerry Maldonado.  

Final - Biercelona 6 - 3 Defenders of the Bridge (but Lionsbridge still showed VBU what's up -- right boys?)

Hangover 86 FC vs. Oozlekicks - 'Teenage Mutant Ninja Coble 2: Secret of the Ooze'

This game should have been closer, but Jay Coble stood on his head with at least two memorable saves - a diving save on a volley and a push up onto the crossbar on a looping shot from Karina.  Meanwhile, his team spread the goal wealth around with all 5 goals by different players including a goal by each Weniger.

Final - Oozlekicks 5 - 0 Hangover 86 FC

Kick in a Box vs. Misfits - 'Where Eagles Dare.. to Score'

At halftime, Kick in a Box was sniffing around an upset -- only being down 3-2.  But in the second half, Misfits put on their Doc Martens and went moshing.   Led by Trey Engleburg's hat trick and another couple from Davin Field that put him in the #2 slot for the golden boot, these Misfits slam danced into the playoffs.  Meanwhile, it left Kick in a Box refreshing the scores to see which bracket they'd end up in.  Stay tunnnnnned.

Final - Misfits 7 - 2 Kick in a Box

White Joggers vs. All Stars FC - 'The Joggers See Stars'

White Joggers started solid, but has seen their early momentum fade in recent weeks.  Meanwhile, All Stars has been consistently strong all season and is sure to make some noise next week.  Like Oozlekicks before them, they spread the offense around on Sunday with goals by 6 different players and a married couple each scoring a goal with both Rojas's (Anderson and Vick) scoring goals.  And like Kick in a Box, White Joggers started nibbling on their fingernails in anticipation of the last few games.

Final - All Stars FC 6 - 2 White Joggers

PKs and IPAs vs. Netkicks and Chill - 'Are you still watching 'MLS's Most Surprising Team'?'

Netkicks locked in their second place spot with a win over PKs and IPAs in the last game of the season.  Netkicks started strong with a couple of goals by Brendan Fajotina and a couple from Chris O'Neal.  Meanwhile, if PKs and IPAs could pull of the upset, they had a solid chance to end up in the top bracket.  Instead, they look like a strong pick for bringing home the League 2 trophy.  

Final - Netkicks 7 - 3 PKs and IPAs

Hot and Messi vs. Ronaldo McDonaldo - 'Hot and Messi starts with a 6 piece'

I won't revisit what has already been said, but starting with 6 players against the only undefeated team in the league is going to get a bit messi.  And it did as Ronaldo wanted to put the score out of reach if the weather turned nasty.  Once Hot and Messi had Carlos Grimaldo and Marvin Arboine show up, the game stabilized and RM's attack was slowed.  Highlights from this one were a great front post goal off a corner by Jennie Grayson of H&M and a hat trick from Dara Emami of RM.  

Final - Ronaldo McDonaldo 9 - 1 Hot and Messi

Look Ma No Hands vs. Moat Monsters - 'Look Ma, 4 Monster Goals'

The game of the week lived up to the hype with the final being decided by one goal.  In reviewing Ryan O'Donnell's photos, this one looked to be quite the clash on the physical and verbal side of the house.  Last season's Golden Gal, Calli Sherrill seems to have found her scoring boots just in time for the playoffs with a couple of goals, while Matt Burleson of Moat continues his solid offensive season.  In the end, Moat outlasted Look Ma and put LMNH in a precarious playoff position.  Time to wait it out with White Joggers and Kick in a Box.

Final - Moat Monsters 4 - 3 Look Ma No Hands

You can't take this as gospel b/c the standings in the Google sheet don't take into account the tiebreaking formulas or the fact that Biercelona is ineligible for the playoffs, so I'm going to take you through some analysis.  

FINAL STANDINGS

1. Ronaldo McDonaldo

2. Netkicks and Chill

3. Oozlekicks (Tiebreaker over All Stars was Goals Allowed)

4. All Stars FC 

5. Moat Monsters

6. Misfits

7. Look Ma, No Hands (Tiebreaker over White Joggers was Head 2 Head)

8. White Joggers (Tiebreaker over Kick in a Box was # of wins)

9. Kick in a Box (Tiebreaker over Retired Athletes was Goals Allowed)

10. Retired Athletes

11. PKs and IPAs

12. Hangover 86 FC

13. Defenders of the Bridge

14. Hot and Messi

15. All Bark, No Bite

16. Biercelona (ineligible for the playoffs - moved to 16 seed and will have #9 seed auto-advance in lower bracket playoffs)

A 5 way tie from the 7 seed to the 11 seed made for some interesting discussions between Brent and I as he guided me through the CLUBWAKA tie-breaker procedure. At multiple different times, I thought - Kick in a Box is #8, wait... White Joggers is number 8. Wait... how did Retired Athletes get up here so fast? So. Much. Drama.

TEAM OF THE WEEK - WEEK 7

Jennie Grayson - First goal on a corner kick -- near post run with a gorgeous flick against the #1 seed.  I'd say that's memorable.

Erin Weniger - Another first timer on the score sheet.  A player that gets better every season and still doesn't have a pair of cleats.  :)

Vick Rojas - A mainstay for Foot Works last season and has been a key figure in the rise of All Stars this season.  Bagged a goal this week against White Joggers.

Karina Ruelas - Of all the players on Hangover, Karina was the closest to scoring with a little looper over Jay's head that was pushed against the crossbar.  Outside of that close call, she was all over the field for the 86ers.

Cristina Genoese-Zerbi - First goal.  Ballin' out for the #2 seed.

Erica Rice - Struggled on this one as Kathy White and Erica both played the whole game for DOTB and played extremely well in their loss to Biercelona.  But then I remembered that prior to the start of games on Sunday, there was no TP in the port-o-john and Erica saved the day.  TP Tiebreaker takes her to Team of the Week!  

Brittany Hull - Retired Athletes winning streak coming close to coinciding with Brittany joining the team?  Interesssssssting....

THE RACE FOR THE GOLDEN BOOT

I tried two things this week.  I tried to score goals, but the more I tried the more I shanked.  Then I tried to motivate Davin by calling him out for not coming to enough games.  All that did was make him catch me so now I don't even have second place.  Meanwhile, Tom keeps coasting, whistling, and pushing for the double-dime.  Looks like he's all but secured the golden boot.

One thing I always find interesting is looking at goal scorers by team.  Most high scoring teams have two or three strikers bagging goals - See Davin and Trey, Chris and Callum, and me/Machie/Dara, but if you look back across the last three seasons - Tom does this every season for Oozlekicks.  And yet we can't seem to stop him.  Will Misfits be able to stop him this week?  Will Davin, Burleson, or I go crazy bonkers on the scoresheet and miraculously lift the Golden Boot?  Doubtful but Liverpool came back from a 3-0 deficit to win 4-3 on aggregate, so don't count us out.

PHOTOS OF THE WEEK

Brad Kirby's Selections

Isaiah Reynolds of Biercelona keeps one out against Defenders of the Bridge on Sunday.

Chris Sharrett lines up a volley for PKs and IPAs as Netkicks looks on.

Markis Augustus levitates to secure the ball while Mark Halverson of PKs and IPAs is mesmerized by his ups.

Allison Yang serves up a corner for Hangover 86. 

Cheer as a team, play like a team.  Oozlekicks gets fired up before the game.

Matthew Carpenter of White Joggers chips one in.

Chaos ensues as Kory Kulzer goes down in the box in front of Joe Ingraham and Brian Diamond of Look Ma, No Hands.

Vick Rojas of All Stars 86 FC heads to goal.

WEEK 7 AT OOZLEFINCH

Supposed to be a gorgeous day in the mid-80s.  Stick around and watch some playoff soccer and then get some post-MLS pie and a brew over at Oozlefinch. Flame and Pie will be out there.  

GAME OF THE WEEK - WEEK 7

ALL OF THEM!  It's the PLAYOFFS, you dum dum!

First games are on Field A and are the top bracket. Second games on field B and bottom bracket.

12 PM (4 vs 5 games)

All Stars vs Moat -- If I had to pick a top bracket game of the week, this would be it. All Stars beat Moat earlier in the season and Moat beat Foot Works twice at the end of the Fall, so this is turning into a biiiiiit of a rivalry.

Hangover vs DOTB -- Hangover has had a bit of a hangover from the Fall, but look to make a run at the cup. Meanwhile, DOTB are going to be fueled by Lionsbridge's win over Virginia Beach on Tuesday so I have a feeling this one may be closer than we think.

1 PM (2 vs 7 games)

Netkicks vs Look Ma - Netkicks won earlier this season 4-3 and Look Ma will be looking for some serious revenge. This will be a battle of two solid defenses. I'm guessing this will be decided on offensive firepower -- will it be Calli and Scott making the difference or Brendan and Daryl?

Retired Athletes vs All Bark No Bite - a rematch of week 7. Can ABNB get their first win of the season and spoil Retired Athletes two game winning streak?

2 PM (1 vs 8 games)

Ronaldo vs White Joggers - Ronaldo McDonaldo leads the league in goals scored and has the fewest goals allowed. White Joggers comes in on a 3 game losing streak. You'd think this one is sewn up, but don't count out the Joggers who started the season really strong. Meanwhile, Ronaldo McDonaldo is aging as we speak.

Kick in a Box vs Biercelona - this one is a foregone conclusion, but Ryan O'Donnell and KiaB look to recharge their offense and build some momentum going into Round 2 against the winner of Hangover and DOTB. But Biercelona - they ain't going out like that (they ain't goin out).

3 PM (3 vs 6 games)

Oozle vs Misfits - This would have been my game of the week, but rumor has it Misfits is dealing with some injuries. That being said, I have confidence that Adam will have them talking $*** and playing dirty come Sunday, so while I'd say they're favored, I wouldn't move Oozlekicks forward yet.

PKs and IPAs vs Hot and Messi - This is my lower bracket game of the week if Hot and Messi has their squad show. I honestly think they could put together a run. But stopping Mark Halverson and Chris Sharrett ain't easy. Think this one could be a squeaker. Or even better -- go to PKs!

So much can be said about these games that hasn't been talked about already -- players that will make a difference, individual match-ups, key injuries and absences, predictions, biggest soccer crushes, best dressed.  One of you should totally do that, but I'm all out of words sooo....

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CLUBWAKA MLS - Spring 2019 Week 4

WEEK 4 - Breakin'

When Brent and I were putting together the schedule, we had some concerns about having to have what amounts to three Sundays off to accommodate Easter, Memorial Day, and the Sand Soccer Tourney.  That's not including the fact that we may end up having to play on Mother's Day and Father's Day.  But now that we've come to break 1 after 4 games, I think it's a perfect time to chill out, max, relax all cool, go to church, see your family, and reflect on CLUBWAKA MLS Spring 2019 happenings.

So that's what we're doing on this lovely Easter.  Midseason reflection y'aaaaaaaaaaaaaaall.

But first...

HOUSEKEEPING

1.  The Lost and Found is overflowing.  I literally have 10 water bottles in my garage from people forgetting them every week and like 3 extra soccer balls.  So I'll be bringing those out on 4/28 for people to pick them up.  But going forward, please please please remind your players post-game to grab their stuff so I don't need to rent a storage space for CLUBWAKA MLS Lost and Found.  

2.  Every week I hear from at least 2-3 players about something they didn't agree with in regards to referee calls.  This midseason blog is a good place to remind everyone that the refs are human and are covering an entire field by themselves.  GIVE THEM A BREAK.  And in regards to that, I think it's up to each team to semi-police themselves.  If a ball is out of bounds, give it to the other team -- don't try to cheat the system.  If you fouled someone, don't flip out and walk the other way, help the person up, apologize, and take the whistle.  If a new ref doesn't know a rule, tell it to them without screaming. 

And just a reminder for all you a) litterers and b) players trying to get one over on the ref:

3. Mother's Day is coming up 5/12.  As I sent out previously, we're doing Mother's Day photos for the second consecutive year.  Unfortunately, if I'm going to get them printed so you can have them a week before Mother's Day (5/5), that only leaves us this coming up Sunday to get them done.  I'll be coming back from a wedding in DC that AM and won't be there very early on that Sunday but will be around all day and will be glad to stay after (my game is at 1 PM that day).  I won't be coming around to solicit each team, so if you want one just come find me and we can straight Olan Mills those Ft. Monroe fields.  Here's a couple examples from last week.

WEEK 4 RESULTS AND STANDINGS

Kick in a Box vs. Defenders of the Bridge

This game was a back and forth affair that ended with a last second free kick blast by Ryan O'Donnell to earn a point against Defenders of the Bridge.  Scott Hines had me feeling those regrets post-game for not getting his second goal on camera and his subsequent shirt removal celebration.  I tried to encourage the ref to give him a straight red for his overenthusiastic celebration, but he wasn't havin it.  

Final - Kick in a Box 2 - 2 Defenders of the Bridge

All Bark No Bite vs. Oozlekicks

Call off the dogs.  Oozlekicks collared All Bark No Bite with a 10 goal explosion led by Tom Weniger's 4 goals.  Despite being the in winless column, All Bark No Bite still has a lot of fight in them and will look to get on track in Week 5 against Kick in a Box.  

Final - Oozlekicks 10 - 0 All Bark No Bite

Look Ma No Hands vs. Netkicks and Chill

GAME OF THE WEEK.  The undefeated Netkicks team taking on a solid top half team in Look Ma.  Netkicks took a commanding lead early with goals by Brendan Fajotina and Daryl Kuligowski in the first half.  The second half proved to be a different story as Look Ma continued fighting back (Scott George with another brace) and had chances to even the score late.  Ultimately, Netkicks prevailed and continues to sit at the top of the table having only given up 4 goals all season.  

Final - Netkicks and Chill 4 - 3 Look Ma, No Hands

White Joggers vs. Hot & Messi

White Joggers took on Hot and Messi in a very evenly matched game on paper but in speaking with H&M captain Dave Chappell prior to the game, half their roster is out with injuries.  Luckily the Pink Patrol have a 19 person roster.  In a game where there was a lot of referee chirping and a couple of cards, White Joggers continued their hot streak with a 6 goal outpouring and some absolutely miraculous saves from their keeper Matthew Carpenter.

Final - White Joggers 6 - 3 Hot & Messi

Retired Athletes vs. Hangover 86 FC

After last season's jump up the table, Hangover was dealt a tough early season schedule - having to face Ronaldo, Misfits, and Moat all in the first three games.  In week 4, they took on a Retired Athletes team that has been up and down thus far.  Both teams fought hard trying to earn that first win of the year.  Hangover was led by Jerald Jorge who was all over the field and Jordan Yingling for a hell of a shout outside of the box.  Ultimately, the couldn't break the stalemate with Retired Athletes earning their second draw of the season.  How anti-climactic!

Final - Retired Athletes 2 - 2 Hangover 86 FC

Misfits vs. Biercelona

Misfits cranked the volume up to 11 in the first few minutes of the game with goals by Blake Sexton and Davin Field early.  With Misfits setting the tone, it was too much for Biercelona to come back from despite solid efforts by Drew Shotts and Brandy Jayne.  In this one, there was controversy as the Biercelona keeper punted, the referee penalized them with a free kick outside of the box (should have been at half field) and Blake scored on the free kick.  

Final - Misfits 5 - 1 Biercelona

All Stars FC vs. Ronaldo McDonaldo

In the day's only battle of undefeateds, Ronaldo McDonaldo worked hard on defense to attempt to stifle the potent offense of All Stars FC.  Led by Leland Remias, Anderzon Rojas, and Valentin Valencia, they have been on a goalscoring tear.  With Steve Midlik and Frank Council holding down the back for Ronaldo McDonaldo, Dara Emami broke out to bag a hat trick as Ronaldo went on to down the All Stars and stay undefeated on the season.

Final - Ronaldo McDonaldo 5 - 1 All Stars FC

Moat Monsters vs. PKs and IPAs

Like Retired Athletes, PKs and IPAs has been up and down each game of the season thus far.  As everyone in the league knows, Moat Monsters has the talent to win the championship every season and they certainly showed it in Week 4.  Led by Matthew Burleson and Sarah Watson, Moat put the pedal to the metal and put 10 in the ol' onion bag.  

Moat Monsters 10 - 2 PKs and IPAs

Being that we're at midseason, let's take a look at the standings and see what the playoff matchups would be as of today.  As a reminder, the top 8 will vie for the CLUBWAKA MLS Cup and the second half of the table will be playing for the MLS League Two Cup.

MLS Cup Playoffs

(1) Netkicks and Chill vs. (8) Misfits - VERY tough first game for the 1 seed.

(2) Ronaldo McDonaldo vs. (7) Look Ma No Hands - an age old battle of grizzled vets.

(3) White Joggers vs. (6) All Stars FC - two relatively new teams bring a lot of intrigue to the top of the table

(4) Oozlekicks vs. (5) Moat Monsters - would be the game of the week - definitely.

Talk about some amazing games in the first round of the MLS Cup Bracket!  Woooooo weeeeee!

League Two Cup Playoffs

(9) PKs and IPAs vs. (16) All Bark No Bite - PKs and IPAs finish at the top of the second table while All Bark No Bite look for their second playoff win.

(10) Biercelona vs. (15) Hangover 86 FC - I'd call this a rivalry game at this point.  Think they've played each other a few times.

(11) Defenders of the Bridge vs. (14) Retired Athletes - the second table battle of the noobs.

(12) Kick in a Box vs. (13) Hot and Messi - Prepare yourself for some PINK ON PINK CRIME.

TEAM OF THE WEEK - WEEK 4

Tom Weniger - 4 goals.  Probably could have been more.  

Sarah Watson - A brace for Moat Monsters in their blowout win against PKs.

Ryan O'Donnell - A blast of a free kick earned his team a point in a draw against DOTB.

Scott Hines - People on Bourbon Street flash for beads.  Scott Hines flashes for goals.  A brace and a shirtless celebration earn him TOTW honors.

Daryl Kuligowski - Was tough choosing between him and Brendan Fajotina who continue to have Netkicks on the top of the table.  But 2 goals > 1 goal as the tiebreaker.

Brandy Jayne - Held down defense the whole game for Biercelona while taking on Misfits beast of an offense.  Way to hold down the fort, Brandy!

Matthew Carpenter - This guy has (had?) balls.  Saves upon saves upon saves to limit Hot and Messi's goal count and lead White Joggers up the table -- currently sitting in third.

THE RACE FOR THE GOLDEN BOOT

215 goals thus far this year -- they just keep coming.

With his 4 goals against All Bark No Bite, Tom Weniger has cleared a little space at the top of the leaderboard.  Matt Burleson (who plays defense in some games, mind you) currently sits at 2 with a couple of newcomers - Valentin Valencia and Trey Engleburg lining up with Fall's leader - Mike Machie with 6 goals a piece.

PHOTOS OF THE WEEK

Brad Kirby's Selections

Ryan O'Donnell of Kick in a Box faces Jimmy Boonruang of DOTB in a 1 v 1 situation.

Dara Emami of Ronaldo McDonaldo is slighhhhhtly outnumbered in the box as Mike Machie serves one up. 

Ryan O'Donnell's Selections

The Karate Kid (White Joggers keeper Matthew Carpenter) makes a save in the game against Hot and Messi.  Although I'm still struggling to figure out exactly what is going on here.

In CLUBWAKA MLS, all games have a happy ending.

Chad: This smells like grass.  Markis: All I see is ass.  Leonard: *slow clap*

WEEK 5 AT OOZLEFINCH

Not sure who the food truck will be yet but I'm damn sure they'll be serving up some deliciously cold brews, dudes!

Wheezin' the ju-uice.

GAME OF THE WEEK - WEEK 5

Biercelona vs. Hangover 86 FC

With Hangover recovering from their brutal early schedule, they're ready to get a win and Biercelona currently sit on the cusp of the top 8.  I'm not sure why I see this one as such a rivalry game, but having  played a few times in the past, I think it'll be intense.  You know what else is intense?  Camping.

See you next Sunday and I hope you all have a very Happy Easter!  Try not to accost the Easter Bunny, you hooligans!

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