Patriot Week 4 Gambling Lines

Rec N Ballz  (-0.5)   over Ivan Dragos

The first of many big games on Weening Out Wednesday (WOW) that will determine who gets to play in the coveted Yet to Be Named Bowl featuring the #1 and #2 seeds.  The Ball Wreckers had an up and down Week 3 and earned a split in their doubleheader.  Dragos suffered their first loss of the season and missed a golden opportunity to jump out ahead of the pack.  Captain Bryan “PEN-yuh” Pena boldly stated that his Red Army would “Sink the pink”.  I feel a little dirty typing that, but the Dragos should be careful of what they shoot at in here, Troy Southall doesn’t react too well to bullets.

JFK    (-0.5) over  Orange Crush

Fittingly, the Kennedys and America are standing side by side in the standings, but unfortunately for both they are on the outside looking in.  The Fightin’ Freeds can play spoiler to the Orange Crush’s championship aspirations with a win, while Manny and Cystal hope to wrap up a trip to the inaugural TBD Champions Bowl with a win. 

Mean Green Machine (-5.5)  over Flocka Flame

The Machine needs a lot of help if they hope to fight their way into a top tier bowl and it begins with taking care of business against the Flame.  WAKA Jocka Jams Flames  come into this match after an impressive showing in Week 3 against America.  The Flames have locked up a birth in the Little Lebowski Urban Achievers Bowl, but they would love to play the role of spoiler in the pivotal WOW.  They have been practicing and word out of the Mean Green camp is that they have been hoping to skate by on the combined good looks of George Kirizidas and Dominique Smith.         

                 

Rec N Ballz (-1.5) over Beast Mode         

It’s a baby shower!  Ladies first.                           

                                    

JFK(-2.5)  over  SSK

Brent and Dottie were married on a beautiful summer afternoon.  Mark Harmon was forced to spend a beautiful summer teaching a remedial summer school English course in the 1987 film Summer School.  Brent Wentworth is the Mark Harmon of the 3 Up, 3 Down podcast and my daydreams.  Students in summer school usually daydream during class.  Buster Patterson is dreaming if he thinks he has the athletic ability of Mark Harmon during his days under center at UCLA.  Bryan Freed played wing back on the 1972 UCLA team with Mark Harmon that upset the Nebraska Cornhuskers.  UCLA ran the wishbone offense.  I pulled apart a wishbone.  The longer end looked like John Fitzgerald Kennedy. 

America  vs. Mean Green Machine      Pick ‘em

Mean Green will be watching the league scoreboards closely after their 7:00 p.m. opener and that could go a long way towards determining their attitude heading into the America contest.  However, do not interpret the previous sentence to mean that either team will be coasting in this game with their bowl position determined.  There are many players on these two teams who would love nothing more than to beat one another on the field, highlighted by the Adam Henry-Andrea Hoffman showdown. 

Beast Mode   (-0.5) over Summer School Kicks

It doesn’t get much bigger than when Duke versus the University of North Carolina rolls around every March.  The colors are the same, but the story is quite different as Summer School and Beast Mode fight to pull themselves out of the St. Elsewhere Bowl (8 v. 9).  The Beast has been waiting to be unleashed on an unsuspecting victim and this week it happens.  Brandon Silver returns from Tamriel with the heart of a dragon for Tin Man Nick Anderson. 

Crushing on You  (-6.5) over Flocka Flame

If the Orange Crush triumphs in the first half of their WOW doubleheader, they may be overlooking the Flocka Flame.  Hearts will be on fire as the flame burns bright and orange into the night. 

America vs. Ivan Dragos   Pick ‘Em (but if you value your immortal patriotic soul, pick America)

Instead of reading my thoughts on this game, just read a history textbook.  Or watch Rocky IV.  Same thing.

Offseason News & Notes 07/30/12

Registration is still open and teams are filling up fast. With a summer season so ecclectic, we've seen a lot fo new alliances form, with teams having long time player heading to a new team, and just general bouncing around of new players.

One of the big moves we saw in the last Offseason News & Notes was Taylor Wilson, formerly of Chicken Tettrazzini heading to Free Ballin'. Well Chicken didn't take long to replace him by adding Brian Neal and Jon and Holly Lenard from none other than Free Ballin'!

The Foot Snipers were in need of girls and have signed highly sought after free agent Sterling Wilcox.

Foul Balls lost some players through free agency so far, but they weren't going to let that stop them and added Summer rookies Andrew and Amy Doye as well as Jesse and Laura Rogers!

Free Ballin' continue to add to their competitive edge with the signing of Beast Mode summer rookie Shane Nielson.

Those who thought JFK was going to struggle finding talent to replace Wes & Nikki obviously didn't have their ear to the ground listening to the rumblings of the league. How do you replace a dynamic duo like the new captains of Pitch Please!? How about adding the abominable force of Nick & Jiselle Anderson! Somehow, I don't think they're done just yet either.

Kick Ass have added the husband and wife combo of Chris and Crystal Tanner. Seems like that Crushing on You connection worked out in the summer and they can't wait to make it pay off in the Fall.

Quite possibly, one of the most surprising moves of this offseason is Pitch Please!'s acquisition of a founding member of the 5 O'Clockers Kristen Pauley. When asked if he was worried about losing Kristen, Clockers co-captain said, "Due to this move I now guarantee a 5OC win over Pitch Please this season."

With the dissolving of the Jagers, we have seen them on different teams throughout the league. Well Sara Ruch have followed fellow Jagers Mike Ramey & Joe Mazzitti to the Royal Blue of the Rumspringa's.

Lastly, newly formed Wasted Talent have been able to use their Shipyard allegiance and snuck in former Foulie Brad Gault and past Shake n Baker Amy Monteiro. Shaping up nicely guys!

If you have any other offseason news & notes, just shoot me a message and we will be sure to announce all the moves going on.

Congratulations Thane & Colleen!!

Fellow Chubby Gangsters, Thane Osterdahl and Colleen Glanville were married today.

Here's to a lifetime of joy and happiness!

VA Patriot After Midnight Photo Week 3

Congratulations Brent & Dottie!!

For those that don't know, former Jagernaut and current Foul Ball'er, Dottie Wood, was married to her fiance Brent Wentworth today. It was a beautful ceremony. I would like to share a sample of her vows to him. They were so beautiful, I'm not afraid to admit they brought me to tears.

I, Dottie, take you, Brent, to be my beloved husband.
To have and to hold you from advancing to 3rd from 1st.
To honor all your Wentworth Trophy's,
To treasure your horrid pitching faces,
To be at your side in sorrow after losing in the EOS Tournament, and in joy manufactured by free beer at Luckie's during the party afterward.
In the good times now that no one is bitching at you for giving them too many 8:30 games, and in the bad when the tunnel traffic is so bad you almost miss a 6:30 game.
To love and cherish you always, except when you play the Foul Balls.
I promise you this from my heart, for all the WAKA Wednesdays in my life.

In all serious, Congratulations to Brent and Dottie Wentworth. I hope your day was awesome, and good luck to you in your new life together.

The 1st Annual Sackies Awards!

This past Monday was a big event for the Battlestar Ballsacktica team. They rolled out the red carpet for...wait for it.....The 1st Annual Sackies Awards! It was a formal event for anyone who wanted to be formal, but a few didn't care (me) for that attire choice and showed up in flip flops. Hey, that's how I roll! You gotta be getting married or dead for me to show up in a dress! However, I did bring a "tie" to wear for the special occasion ;). It was also a get together celebration for Michael Machie's and Erin Herring's wedding coming up next month...AND a going-away party for our beloved team "mom", Stephanie Wacek. She leaves the country this Saturday and is heading to Malaysia to teach there for at least 2 years. She will be terribly missed! :(

That's awesome!

An awesome WAKA cake was made for the occasion and plenty of food and drink was available. A Golden kickball was presented to Mike and Erin as a wedding gift from the team, and a memory book full of photos of all the good times we've all had together was compiled and presented to Stephanie so she can take us on her journey.

On to the awards! There were several outstanding players on our team this past spring season and it was our duty to give The Sackies awards to the most deserving, so...um....all of us got one! The MC's of the night were Philip Tanner and MVPeter Kuhr who kept us in stitches the entire time! Some of the awards include "Most likely to have a photo of Geoff Morehart on his Nightstand" which went to none other than Brandon Silver! (Bromance Alert!!) "Most Likely to Drive George Home from Luckies" went to Lorraine Adkins. Or how about the "Most likely to write a Ballsack recap that no one reads" that went to.....Karen Savell! (Who thanked her editor and both of her readers...) Another was "Most likely to have the F******Dirtiest F********Mouth on the Team" which went to Nicole Plesha. (After receiving her award, she turned to all of us and said "F***you all!!!!") "Most Likely to Dress up as a Superhero No one has Ever Heard Of" went to George Kiriazidis. "Most Likely to Catch His First Pop Fly Next Season" went to Mike Graziano. "Fastest Teammate to Reply to a Facebook Incoherently" went to Alison Easterday. "Most likely to Organize Team Events from another Continent" went to Stephanie Wacek. "Most likely to Give Bear Hugs to Opposing Team Members" went to Andy Tapley. "Most likely to Not Care about the Awards" went to Jason Weisek. "Most likely to Murder a Team member for not running the Bases Correctly" went to Joe Stumpo, who was not available to accept his award since he's visiting family in Italy. Yeah, he's got ties with the mafia or something....there were so many more, but I can't remember them all. It was all in fun, of course, and we all had a great time!

Editor's note: Hey Loraine! Can I get a ride next time? I promise I won't eat your Chinese food either!

Anyway, the night ended with a few group photos of all of us acting silly, then we played a few rounds of Mafia and just chatted and hung out. Let me tell you, this is a close knitted team who does everything together and I'm glad to be a part of it, even though I flake out a lot from the events since I have a family and I'm married and all that silly stuff...I try to make all that I can because it's soooooo much fun being with this group! We're so proud to be Ballsacks! From Beach party, to trying Bingo, to tubing...it's a group thing and it's what makes Battlestar stand out. We are a family! Next up....camping in the Outer Banks! Be jealous!!!

WAKA VA Peninsula is proud of it's Ballsacks!

BallllllllllllllllllllllllllllllSACKS!!

JFK hands the Dragos Their 1st Defeat



Editors note: this has nothing to do with this blog, I just thought it was awesome.



[You must read this in a very mean, monotone Russian accent]

Finally!! KGB officials have finally allowed us to release our top secret mission to crush all of you into submission to our Mother Russia. Although we can not release our strategy as of yet, we can report on the results only.....or be shot in the head a few times, which I think would hurt....a lot.....sooooo

The Dragos team was undefeated until JFK took control of the game in the 1st and 2nd inning last night. The dead Kennedy's shut down the top 4 kickers of the Dragos line up during the entire match up and forced the Ruskies to a slow start. The commies didn't fold, though. They had a solid defense the entire time. There were a few drops at first base which allowed runners to advance and eventually score....but only a few. Outstanding pop up catches were made by Erin Welch and Bryan Peña. The rest were bunts to the infield and nothing that would really surprise or impress the Soviets much....(Taunt! Taunt!!) The Russian pitching arms of Jesse Jones and Matt Wellbrock made it difficult but not impossible for JFK to make controlled bunts, and pop up kicks. The Dragos' pitching and the team's strong defense helped keep scores down to a minimum.

However, our KGB operatives did not do their jobs properly and switch out the balls to......I mean....our offense wasn't producing like we usually do and we were pretty much shut down in the first couple of innings...and, uh...we are used to bitterly cold Russian winters in Siberia and it was just too hot.....or something.


But it's all ok. We have been ordered to collect a list of names of the people on this JFK team and hunt them down one by one. We will have to brainwash all of them and assimilate them to become like us. And then we will release them back into American population where they will reak havoc upon your country by stealing everyone's left shoe. It will be mayhem, I tell you! We must break you! We must break you ALL!!

P.S.-The Soviet Silent Killer is ever lurking in the outfield waiting patiently for a fly ball and has yet to show off her Silent Killer skills...maybe because you are all fraidy-cat sissy girls and can't get it out there!! (Taunt alert! I'm taunting here!!! TAUNT!!!)

 

Мы должны разорвать вас.
Мы должны разорвать вас всех!

Picture of the Week

photo courtesy of Nick Sutton.

The Ivan Dragos' Guy Sumrell chases down his very photogenic fiance, Justine Jones, in week 3 VA Patriot action!

Smile for the camera!

Offseason News & Notes 7/22/12

The past week, the VA Peninsula page has been wrought with activity. Free Agent Signings, Rookie Signings, even Brand New Teams. So without wasting too much time, let's get down to bidness.

Free Agents

There have been a lot of big signings already this year, and they just seem to keep coming. The summer Patriot season has helped with the mingling of players who may not have normally ever thought about playing with each other, but the biggest reason for all the moves is that 3 big teams are not returning to their glory for the Fall. Jagernauts, Shake n Bake and Moose Knuckles have called it quits and most of their players are being snagged up quick, fast, and in a hurry.

Can Taylor help Free Ballin' win their first ever Bar Belt?



A free agent that has flown under the radar and has now committed to Free Ballin' is former catcher from Chicken Tettrazzini, Taylor Wilson. I suspect the main reason this acquisition hasn't been broadcast much is the lack of awareness that Taylor was indeed on the market. However, I can almost guarantee any team that was on the market for a catcher would have been after him to add the knowledge and athleticism he brings.

On the female front, Foul Balls have signed former long-time Ms. Commissioner, to a deal to dawn Irish Green for the Fall. Dottie Wood will be adding to a team already known for being filled with awesome people who know how to have fun on and off the field. Also, Mimi Gill has agreed to terms with the newly reformatted Kick Ass. Captain Manny Anderson is all about speed and agility and has added a nice piece to his collection (I just made Manny sound really creepy).

Will Mimi be healthy in time to contribute to Kick Ass's fearsome line-up?

Lastly, two of the most talked about free agents in the past week or two are Michael Ramey & Joe Mazzitti. Rumors were flying about where they were going to end up. All that was needed was Joe's blessing. He was off galavanting in the Carribean (I have no idea if that's true, but that's automatically where my head goes when I think honeymoon) while everyone else here was sitting around having to talk about kickball. Well, it is now official they will both be showcasing Rumspringa Blue in the fall and adding to an already stout lineup. Rumspringa can't be Matt Wellbrock's darkhorse for Fall, but it certainly is mine.

 New Teams

There were 16 teams in the Spring. 3 teams are confirmed not coming back. There are 4 brand new friend groups currently signed up vying for the final team positions. The question is, who are they?

Foot Snipers
Anyone who played the 2012 Raptor Winter Season know the Foot Snipers well. The were a southside team with familiar faces that took the league by storm. They played well during the season, had a hard fought tournament, and walked away as the first ever Winner of the Raptor Cup (is that what we ended up calling it?)! Some of the regular names you'll recognize that are already signed up are Anthony "Ant" Williams, Noelle Walsh, and Chris "Bundy" Leblanc. It was originally announced that Bundy would be playing for the Chubby Gangsters this season. Although during his team physical, there were several incommunicable diseases discovered and thus he was relieved of his contract as a CG. It seems he was a little too close to some of the wildlife while being stationed in Africa this summer.

The Situation
The Situation is a name on a lot of kickballers lips these days. And not just kickballers on the Peninsula, but across the country! Currently they are ranked 9th in the kickballlegend.com power rankings, and in the most recent Washington DC Kickball Open tournament then went on to the Chaampionship game and played impressively against the #1 ranked team in the country. They are a team that is obviously touted for their skill on the field, but they also like to fancy themselves as a force to be reckoned with at the bar. If it's competition they've come to VA Peninsula for, they've got it; in both kickball AND partying! Some of the names you'll recognize that are already signed up are Frank Council, Scott Duncan, and Randy Devlin.

Pitch Please!
The two aforementioned teams are built and practiced to make an immediate impact in this league. Pitch Please!, although green when it comes to playing with each other, and even kickball in some respects (they have 5 brand new names and faces already signed up for Peninsula) will be a force coming out of the gate. They are hemled by Nikki Leblanc and Wes McClain and have signed veterans Hass Dubose, Dan Reyes, Kate Barcus, Meghan Dorsey, and Michael Seals. Somehow, I don't think they're done making a splash.

Wasted Talent
This is a brand new friend group that is comprised completely of Apprentice School Alumni who wanted a league that they could be in involved in and meet new people. Mostly, I think they want an excuse to party!Well they've come to the right place. Their captain is former Chubby Gangster Rodney Huffman, and while they won't have much experience, they has a lot of zeal promising a team of 21 players! Good luck Wasters!

What else is going to happen before the Fall deadline?!

Spring 2012 All Peninsula 1st Team

Well, it's the moment you've been waiting for. Out of 291 players who suited up every Wednesday, these are the 11 players that stood out among the pack. 78 players voted and these individuals were deemed to be the best of the best this season. Without further ado, I present to you, the 1st Team All Peninsula selections!

Kickball is truly a team sport, with 11 players in the field and often times more in the lineup. Very rarely will you come across a player with the ability to take over a game and impose their will on an opponent. JC Cashwell is one of those rare gifted players. He logged multiple innings this season for JFK at charger, first base, and pitcher all at an elite level. Whatever, the Freeds needed, he provided. On top of world class defense, JC is an offensive weapon. Underneath his old, holey, lucky, grey sweatpants is one of the most powerful left legs in all of kickball. Mr. Cashwell has given many right fielders nightmares this spring.

The only thing louder than Scott Duncan's mouth is the sound of a kickball exploding off of his powerful right foot. If it's true that "chicks dig the long ball", than Duncan is a magnet. If the league kept reliable stats, than there would be little doubt that Scott Duncan would lead the Peninsula in home runs, with at least 3 this spring. And while Scott is best known for his ability to kick bombs (well, that and his weekly weather report), the area that he's grown the most is in his defense. In the past his form was not always consistent and his strong right arm would be a little wild. But working with SnB's wiley old veteran, Anthony Williams, he was able to improve dramatically. This season, Scott was a deadly assassin at the charger position. With accurate and crisp throws, he terminated bunters with extreme prejudice all season long. 

Patrick Jones is a perennial member of the All Peninsula 1st Team, and it's with good reason. No first baseman in the league can match his unique talent for scooping up balls in the dirt and doing his patented stretch dive to give his defense an extra half second. It's that extra 1/2 second that robs many speedy kickers of base hits. At least once a game, PJ will pull some crazy play out of his butt to create an out where one would not have been had. At the plate, what he lacks in speed, he makes up for with placement and power. He consistently paints the 3rd base line with his bunts, and possesses one of the best 'punch' line drives in the sport. All around, he's still the best first baseman in VA Peninsula and the gap has yet to close.

JFK's fiery on the field leader, Nikki LeBlanc, is one of the best all around ladies in kickball. She's a pure athlete who covers lots of ground at 3rd base and the outfield. Great instincts and solid hands takes away an entire side of the field from opposing kickers. Not many teams have that luxury. LeBlanc also is a fantastic bunter with great speed. But she's not a one dimensional player either. Nikki's got a little pop in her leg and can catch some outfielders if they're napping.

"LITLE UP!", is the battle cry of the Jagernauts. The cheer, inspired by their outfielder, Katie Litle, was used to fire up the 'Nauts and lead them to victory (ok, so not really too many victories for the Jagers this year, but still. Go with it). No lady kickballer is as well respected as Litle is. In fact, 76 out of 78 ballots included votes for Katie. By far the most out of any player on the ballot. My only question is, 'who were the two people that left her off their list?!" Seriously, Litle is a beast. Bunting. Kicking. Defense. Leadership. She's the total package. If only she could learn how to bake a good rice crispy treat with some Snickers® up in them, she'd really have it all. 

A first time member of the All Peninsula team and it's very deserving. Nicole "Pure" Plesha is a beast. She's a multi-talented player, and there isn't much that she can't do. Bunting? Paints the lines. Kicking? Sprays hard line drives all across the field. Defense? Covers her position well, has excellent hands, and displays excellent awareness. Perhaps there was no better example of this than in week 3, when the Ballsacks played their rivals, Free Ballin'. Plesha made the final out of the game to secure the tie, when she blasted JP Wilkinson in the face. Clutch? Yep. 

JFK's flame throwing righty, Daniel "The Condor" Shaw is the first team All Peninsula pitcher. The gentle giant hurls death from above when he's out on the mound. The 6'7'' Shaw uses his ginormous wingspan as a pendulum to put plenty of speed and torque on his pitches. The result is kickers who are constantly off balance and out of their rhythm. In the Fall, Daniel was voted to the 2nd team, but what has vaulted him to the top spot this past season was the addition of some power at the plate. Once a liability, D-Shaw, is now a dangerous weapon. Don't believe me? Ask the Jagernauts. In their first round matchup, he cranked a huge 3 run home run to break open a close game and propel JFK to the next round. 

Joining her husband and JFK teammate, Daniel Shaw, on the first team is Jillian Simms. Simms has been a true warrior this season and has worked very hard in practice to improve her game. The hardwork has paid off. She's one of the most athletic ladies in the league (and I don't just mean that as a code word for 'black', Wellbrock) and uses her speed and foot skills to lay down sweet bunts and reach base consistently. Where she has improved the most though is in her kicking away. Once a one dimensional player, Jill is now a threat to drop a ball into the outfield in any situation. Head coach Bryan Freed was so impressed with Simms new found pop that he utilized her in the heart of the lineup towards the end of the season. Defensively, Jill is as reliable as they come, always alert and in position, and smart when she has the ball. Perhaps there was no better example of this than when she teamed up with her hubby to gun out a would be scoring Bird early in the season! 

"Dominque Smith is the consummate teammate," KA's Nathaniel Johnson gushed, "He has an incredible skill set which allows him to play anywhere on the field at an extremely high level." And it's true. While he's earning this All-Peninsula nod for his roaming of the outfield, it turns out Smith is a multifaceted player who contributed at some of the key infield positions, notably charger. He's a fast guy with great range and a strong arm. On offense, he's equally comfortable laying a nice bunt down or rocking it deep. All in all, Smith is a great contributor in every regard and well deserving of his first All-Peninsula honor.
"It is a pleasure to play beside Dom because of his indefatigable spirit and winning positive winning attitude." Jorts concluded.

Hustle. Intensity. Aggression. Focus. All words that perfectly describe Eric "The Pirate" Stevens when he's out on the kickball field. No man busts his ass as hard as Stevens does, and the efforts pay off. Of course JFK is loaded with talented players (5 first teamers alone), but perhaps no man is more important to their success than their energetic catcher. Stevens specialty is exploding out of the box and gobbling up bunts and making diving catches on pop ups. Many kickers have been left frustrated after one of his patented spin throw lasers beats them out to first base.

Another staple of the All-Peninsula first team is the 5 O'Clockers Josh Waldrop, and it's for good reason. He's all you could want from an outfielder. The speed and instincts to cover a lot of real estate. Reliable hands to make even the most difficult of catches look routine. A good arm and veteran experience. Most importantly, he's an elite offensive weapon that can bunt with precision or kick with power and accuracy. Many times this championship season, Waldrop came through when it mattered most with game winning hits. Most notably a 5th inning sacrifice to plate the game winning run in an early season 1-0 showdown with the Jagernauts. If there is such a thing as a 5 tool player, it's Waldrop. That's why it's not too surprising when he was the only outfielder picked in the first round of the VA Patriot Summer League draft.

There you have it! Please join me in congratulating the members of the Spring 2012 All-Peninsula team!

In case you missed it:
Spring 2012 All-Peninsula 2nd Team
Spring 2012 All-Peninsula 3rd Team

VA Patriot - After Midnight Photo Week 2!

What a crew! (photo courtesy of Jiselle Anderson, Beast Mode)

Kim Merritt feels "Chubby, and Gangsterish"

That's right. The Chubby Gangsters are making moves in the offseason. Kim Merritt has agreed to come play for the CG's and couldn't fit in more perfectly. And apparently they had exactly what he was looking for too. "Anybody that offers the mound and a modest roster size is hard to turn down. Plus I've never been light blue." Kim brings much needed experience but is also a great presence on the field, both as a team mate and generally as a good time.

Welcome to the Chubby Gangster's Kim. We're glad we could help you out with the one color kickball shirt you don't have!


After hearing the news, every Chubby Gangster at The Cactus on Wednesday reacted just like this!




Kick Ass captain seen in Russia

*SPOILER ALERT* "Hey Jesse, what team are
you playing for in the Fall?"

Kick Ass captain, Manny Anderson, stepped off a plain back onto American soil today after making a scouting trip to Mother Russia. The question is, did he come back empty-handed?



In fact, he did not. And one of his signings just may surprise you...

Jesse "Who?" Jones is returning to the glory of his former team, and bringing his gun slinging with. Jesse is an excellent pitcher, and all around great defender, with speed on the base paths and an incredible desire to win. Picking Jesse back-up is a step in the right direction in ensuring Kick Ass has another stellar year, and an all around perfect fit.

Manny did not stop there however. If one Ivan Drago is good... two must be better right? That must be why Kick Ass's newest addition is former Foul Ball catcher Bryan "I Let People Pronounce My Name Wrong For 6 Months" Pena. This surprising pick-up adds a stand-out rookie catcher to the depth of Manny's continually growing arsenal of speed and athleticism.



They will break you!

If you didn't think Kick Ass was coming back with avengance after that Wentworth Trophy... you better think again!

3 Up 3 Down - Episode 14

3 Up 3 Down breaks down week 1 of VA Patriot action!

Litle & Kittelson to Burning Bridges

The off-season buzz continues with two more huge moves. The rumors of whether the Jagernauts would or would not be returning for another season in the Fall were set to rest after Phil Baltzis, captain of the Burning Bridges, makes his official announcement that he has signed Katie Litle and Julie Kittleson.

Chug! Chug! Chug! Jagernauts!

This signing could quite possibly give Burning Bridges the best female squad in Peninsula. If you don't believe me, look at these names: Julie Bowers, Dani Buchannon, Kimberly Morgan (3rd Team All Peninsula), Jenn Tull (2nd Team All Peninsula). You can confidentially tell me who the easy out is, or which girl I'm going to try and exploit in the field among these ladies.

When asked for his thought, Captain Baltzis commented, "They have the kickball knowledge to fit right in with the Bridges and continue to make strides to winning that Wentworth trophy. There will truly be zero weaknesses in our defense especially with our ladies. I look forward to having these great women joing the great women we already have." Definitely hard to argue.

Geoff Morehart: Chubby Gangster or Beast Mode?

The free agent market is buzzing this off season. There are a lot of moves being made, and even more that haven't been made yet. One of the more sought after free agents is the former Chubby Gangster catcher and current Beast Mode captain Geoff Morehart. With rumors of Geoff re-forming his own team again for the Fall, there was no certainty what jersey he would be wearing.

Well the wait is over and Geoff Morehart has announced he has signed a short-term deal with Battlestar Ballsactika for Fall 2012.

When asked how he felt about wearing Battlestar Orange, Geoff expressed he was most impressed by how Battlestar pursued him. "I feel like Mario Williams. I had multiple offers from top-tier teams, or to go back to the team I started in this league with, but in the end I went with the Buffalo Bills for their potential and how great their front office treated me."

Stay tuned for other big moves to be announced as they unfold.

This picture makes a lot more sense now.

Spring 2012 All-Peninsula 2nd Team

Oh man, I know you all have been waiting patiently for this (I apologize, this week ended up being a very busy one). Without further ado, I present to you, the 2nd Team All-Peninsula award winners!

"If you want to jump start your offense an solidify your infield defense, Manny Anderson is one of those rare players that can do both at the highest level," teammate Nathaniel Johnson was quoted earlier this season. Indeed, Anderson has always had the physical gifts. The guy is a fitness freak. But what was missing in previous seasons was the experience. Well, in his 4th full season of WAKA Kickball, Manny has gotten the reps needed and his now an elite contributor on both sides of the ball. From the charger position, he lead Kick Ass to the #1 seed with an 8-1-1 record, while also serving as captain. "Manny always strives to make those around him better," Jorts commented, "and has even managed to help his best friend, Danger, clean up his life."

The eccentric Matt Barcus may be known more for his outlandish actions off the field, but he rightly deserves recognition for his performance on it. He's one of the best all around first basemen in kickball. A former football punter, when Barcus gets a hold of a pitch he can bomb it. Just ask the Clockers. In their week 5 matchup, Barcus drove in 3 runs with a triple to spark a JFK comeback to tie the game. But he's not just a one dimensional player. The experienced Barcus fields his position with the best of them. Sure handed and with great instincts and range, Matt takes care of business.

Not too many girls can spray liners all over the field like the talented Tracy Colby. Hell, not too many guys can. Colby, a lifelong soccer player, has skills that make her a threat to drive in runs every time she's at the plate. Don't bring your outfield in against her. She'll make you pay. In the outfield, Tracy Colby was solid all season. Opponents would occasionally try to test out right field, but she'd leave them disappointed every time. Colby can track down fly balls and effortlessly makes catches on the run. All around, Tracy, is a great player and we'll all miss her next year. In the Fall, she'll be transferring to the WAKA MA Indepence League.

Hassan Dubose, better known as Hass Dooby, was a dominant force on the mound for Kick Ass. The KA defense had a league leading 1.5 runs allowed per game, and it all began with the imposing presence of Hass. The powerful lefty hurls his pitches with a tough mixture of speed, movement, and bounce, leaving opponents confused and uncomfortable in the box.
"I have never seen Hassan Dubose have an 'off' night. Hass brings sick southpaw speed and spin to the mound," teammate Nathaniel Johnson said recently, "Even some of the most offensively talented players in the league have fallen victim to foul outs at the hands of Hass."
Indeed, there was no greater display of this than the week 7 matchup with Shake N Bake. Hass absolutely dominated the top ranked offense, including several foul outs of other All-Peninsula players.

Courtney Efird has always had the potential to be one of the best girls in kickball. The athletic Poquoson native has always been able to field her position well, and has one of the strongest female legs in the division. This season she took a giant leap forward as she expanded her game to the travel scene. Within the last six months, Efird has played in competitive tournaments in Ft. Lauderdale and Atlanta. And while her teams haven't done all that well, the experience she got playing against the top teams in the world has paid off, and she helped the Clockers win the championship. The league has definitely taken notice of her performance and has voted her into her first All-Peninsula team! 

The legendary Roger Jackson is a staple of the All-Peninsula voting. Perhaps the quickest catcher in the league, the nimble Jackson bursts out of the box and smothers bunts. No catcher gets to more balls in the air than Roger, and with sure hands he makes more than his fair share of highlight reel diving catches. One of the pioneers of the position on the Peninsula, any aspiring catchers should watch the way he plays the game and see how it's done.

Oh Johnny! Shake N Bake's John LaNeave is one of the most feared kickers in the league. Despite a dubious "C" rating in the VA Patriot mock draft (JP Wilkinson is never going to live that down), he can do it all. The former soccer and competitive softball player can paint the lines with crisp bunts and slice up defenses with accurately place liners. LaNeave gave SnB coaches Tracy Colby and Jeffrey Scott plenty of options, as he's been deployed up and down the lineup depending on who is available. With talent like LaNeave on the squad, it's not hard to see why Shake N Bake had the league's most explosive offense.

When you give yourself the nickname of "The On-Base Machine" than you better be prepared to back it up. Bryan "NoShoes" Moore did just that. Kicking in the top 3 of the order for Kick Ass, NoShoes was nearly flawless this season, reaching base over 20 times and scoring several runs. Moore's consistency on offense was a big reason why KA finished with the top seed. But it wasn't just the offensive performance that Moore contributed. With over 50 seasons of kickball under his belt, NoShoes brought a wealth of tactical knowledge to the young Kick Ass squad. With his advice, Kick Asses lineup and strategies were greatly improved this season and the result was seen on the field and in the standings. Take all that and also add that according to teammate Jorts Johnson, "He had a pretty sweet mohawk sometimes." and you can see why he's a worthy member of the All-Peninsula team.

Ryan Schmid is a passionate player who is always down to strike up a kickball conversation. His love and dedication to the game has turned a lot heads after his second full season in VA Peninsula.
"Ryan's always high strung and intense on game day," Burning Bridges head coach Phillip Baltzis said, "He plays as hard as anyone on field and always gives me everything he's got."
A versatile player, he can both kick away with power and bunt with skill. In the outfield, he holds it down, covering plenty of real estate (his aerodynamic faux hawk cuts through the air, giving him a speed advantage) and very rarely misplaying a ball in the air. Overall, Schmid is a all around baller and worthy of the All-Peninsula honor.

If you're a 5 O'Clocker and your first name is Courtney, than chances are you are pretty damn good. Courtney Travis is no exception. When she first came into the league, she was known mostly for being Britney Travis' little sister, but she's definitely made a name for herself, on and off the field. The former softball player is a natural athlete. She's got speed and great bunting skills. Once she gets on the base, she's smart, aggressive, and most of all, dangerous. She's an all around talented kickballer, a champion, and now an All-Peninsula Team honoree.

Typically, the 2 spot in the lineup is filled by one of the team's best bunters with speed and base running ability. The idea is that you need to have a person with a high on base percentage in that role to get on and score runs. It's very rare to see a woman kicking in the #2 spot on a high ranking team. Jenn Tull is exception. "Jenn is extremely well rounded," captain Phillip Baltzis said recently, "She is probably the most consistent offensive threat on our team." Tull is a lifelong soccer player and has played at high levels. Her experience on the pitch has left her with elite foot skills. One of the best bunters in the league and enough speed to make them count. When needed Tull can also rip them with the best. "Without a doubt, I consider her one of the top girls in the league." Baltzis stated. The league agrees; voting Tull onto the All-Peninsula team.